


Shiro loves you, baby

by orphan_account



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-12
Updated: 2016-07-12
Packaged: 2018-07-23 01:57:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7462134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shiro begins have second thoughts about the Kerberos mission, and goes to see Keith the night before.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shiro loves you, baby

**Author's Note:**

> The others are mentioned a little I guess

Shiro didn't know why he was suddenly having an anxiety attack, he had been preparing for almost seven months, when his higher ups had started thinking about the Kerberos mission. He and the Holts has been sworn to secrecy, and not being able to tell Keith was driving him up a wall. The mission has been publicly announced a few weeks ago, along with the tiny crew. Keith had been visibly upset when they met up in the training room that night, and tension had been high between them since. Now, he was leaving in the morning, and felt like someone was stacking cars on his chest.

He kept reminding himself to take deep breaths as he made his way to Keith's room, worried that Keith might not even want to see him. Shiro was grateful that Keith had his own room. He stopped in front of Keith's door and didn't knock. He stared at it, listening to the clock behind him tick away as he tried to calm down at least a little before knocking. Shiro didn't hear footsteps behind him, too caught up in his thoughts.

"Shiro?" The very, very familiar voice snapped him out of his thoughts, and he spun around to see Keith in front of him. Seeing him there gave him a conflicting emotional response, he immediately felt calmer, and his anxiety and heart rate jumped up. Though, his heart could've been caused by the fact that his boyfriend was standing in front of him covered in sweat, wearing shorts, and a jacket over his tank top. Shiro's jacket.

"Uh..." Shiro's words had escaped him, Keith moved forward, looking worried. "I'm fine!" He said quickly, moving away. "I just wanted to...look around one last time before I left, commit it to memory y'know?" The laugh after he spoke sounded fake, even to his own ears. "I'll see you tomorrow, night!" He rushed the words out, turning quickly to walk away.

"Stay the night?"

Shiro stopped moving, he had only taken three steps so Keith was speaking softly. He wanted to stay the night, he really did, but he didn't want to break down in front of Keith. Shiro opened his mouth to turn him down when Keith hugged him from behind.

"Please?" Keith whispered, looking up at him. Shiro's breath caught in his throat, and he managed a tiny nod. Guess he'd just have to make sure he bottled it up tonight. The smile that lit up Keith's face made him feel a little better about it.

A few minutes later Shiro had his face buried in Keith's pillow, breathing deeply while he waited for Keith to finish showering. God he was gonna miss this, he almost wanted to go to command and tell them he couldn't go to Kerberos anymore, but it was too late. He was already missing the way Keith smelled, and how his body fit perfectly against Shiro's when they slept. Shiro opened his eyes when Keith walked out, in long sweatpants and one of Shiro's heavy long shirts. He had no idea when or how Keith had stolen a shirt and a jacket, but he definitely didn't have an issue with seeing his tiny boyfriend wearing (drowning) in his own clothes.

Keith hung his towel up, trudging over to Shiro and tugging the pillow off his lap, replacing it with himself. His legs wrapping around Shiro's waist and arms draped over his shoulders. Shiro gently laid his hands on Keith's waist, looking up at him. Keith's heart skipped a beat when Shiro did. The look on Shiro's face could only be described as pure adoration, and Keith felt he didn't deserve to be looked at like that, to have someone like Shiro look at him with such love in his eyes and face. He definitely didn't deserve to have _Takashi Shirogane_  look at him like that, the greatest Pilot they had ever had, and he was looking at Keith like Keith was the best thing to ever happen to him.

Keith buried his face in Shiro's neck, moving his arms so he could. He knew he was blushing and his heart was racing, always did when Shiro looked at him like that.

"So, why were you standing outside my door looking terrified?" Keith asked, running his hands through Shiro's hair. After a short tickle fight that Shiro won, they ended up cuddling, with Keith's back pressed against the wall and Shiro laying between his legs, back to chest. There was an episode of something playing on a tiny TV in front of them, but neither of them were paying attention.

"Did I really look terrified?"

"Almost as scared as when you kissed me then ran." Keith teased, hoping to coax him into talking by being casual about it. Shiro shifted slightly, sitting up a little more and scooting closer to Keith.

"...The mission, tomorrow. It sank in tonight, _really_ sank in that I'll be gone for a year, possibly a more than a year depending on if everything goes alright," Shiro's voice had slowly gotten quieter, he was whispering now. "I won't be able to talk to you- or anyone- much, any possible messages will take months to deliver and they might not even go through in the end," Shiro reached up, snagging one of Keith's hands and holding it. "I won't be able to hug you or hold your hand, there won't be any cuddles or late night spars.... No more sneaking out to our house." He said it so casually, as if the shack in the desert was really their house.

"I don't want to be away from you, from everyone for so long, normal excursions are hard, the adjusting back to earths gravity is the hardest part, but this time that might be the easiest part."

Keith squirmed until Shiro leaned forward, slipping around so he was kneeling in front of his boyfriend. Shiro looked tired, and upset. It definitely wasn't a look Keith liked, he hated seeing Shiro upset. Keith scooted closer until he was kneeling between his legs, his hands resting on Shiro's chest. He had absolutely no idea what he was supposed to say to Shiro to make him feel better, this was the first time he had ever been in a relationship.

"I'm gonna miss you too," He whispered, looking at Shiro's cheeks instead of meeting his eyes. "It'll probably be hell down here without you," Keith went silent, he really wasn't good with the whole comforting thing. Shiro was silent as well. "You'll be fine though, you probably won't have a lot of free time-" _Unlike me_ he thought bitterly, already aware of how much extra time he would have on his hands. "- You'll be busy working, when you're done you'll be tired and will pass out immediately." God he must sound horrible, because his boyfriend working himself to the bone was better than missing him wasn't it? No it fucking wasn't, but as much as Keith hated the fact that he was leaving, he didn't want to say anything that might make him find a way out of it.

"I'll still miss you. Talking to you makes my day better, even if it's in the infirmary because you got in a fight again." They were both whispering, despite the fact that they didn't need to. Keith didn't know how long it was until someone spoke again, the only noise was the TV show for quite some time.

Keith took a deep breath, a very shaky one. The words he said next were not what he had planned on saying.

"I don't want you to go."

Another prolonged silence, Keith slumped forward, his head pressed against Shiro's chest as guilt shot through his body. He shut his eyes tight and clenched his teeth.

"I don't want to go either." Shiro admitted, wrapping his arms around Keith and hugging him close, arms tight. It was totally silent, the episode was over apparently. Keith sniffled and slowly wrapped his arms all the way around Shiro, adjusting himself so he was hugging him sideways as he started crying, which he would never admit and would definitely kill Shiro if he ever spoke about it. It took a while for him to stop crying, the clock nearby read 2:30 AM. Shiro had to be up at six, and ready to launch by seven. Keith sat up, breaking the right embrace and rubbed at his eyes.

"We should sleep." His voice was barely audible, Shiro agreed, speaking barely louder than Keith. He tugged Keith down so they were laying facing each other. The TV had been shut off while he was crying.

Shiro brushed his fingers over Keith's cheek. "Can I steal one of your hoodies for when I'm gone?" Keith stared at him.

"You know it won't fit you right? I'm like, five feet shorter than you." Shiro snorted at that. They always ended up joking around after someone cried.

"It'll smell like you though.. Might not last the whole time, but it's something of yours. I can give you a new hoodie of mine, all the ones you stole probably don't smell like me anymore." Shiro was bargaining with him, amusing.

"Mm...deal," Keith snuggled closer, pressing close to Shiro. "Night, Shiro..."

"Night baby. I love you." Shiro tugged the blanket over them.

"I love you too."

\--

Keith was kicked out of the school less then a month after the crash was reported. He had gotten one message from Shiro, and he kept that on his personal phone so he could look at it whenever he was lonely. It wasn't a long message, shorter ones made it faster apparently. He had gotten the picture the day before the crash was reported. It was a picture of Shiro somehow squished into Keith's jacket, looking lovingly into the camera. He had titled it "Shiro loves you, baby."

Keith would never admit that he had squeaked out loud when he opened it. He would never admit that he had really gotten kicked out for lashing out at a superior who bad mouthed Shiro and said Shiro was a terrible pilot and it was his fault they all died.

He would never forget the news report of the crash. Lessons were cancelled and all day he could hear the report in his head.

 _"The Kerberos mission has failed. The craft crashed, due to pilot error. We will not be sending a rescue team."_ That was what the professor said. He didn't watch what was reported on TV, he didn't think he could stomach hearing about it again. Keith found it extremely amusing when they started using simulations based on a rescue mission for Kerberos.

After being kicked out, he ended up at the shack, he had only brought a few pairs of clothes, making sure he had everything of Shiro's and a few pictures. Living here would be hard, not because of the heat, but because of all the memories.

\--

_"Babe there's no way you're gonna get the window open without breaking it, it's practically welded shut." Keith scowled and shot a dirty look at Shiro, who was sitting on the ground watching him._

_"If you got up and helped I could." He shot back, yanking hard on the window, a quiet groan slipping from his mouth when it still didn't budge. He punched the window sill. Shiro slipped behind him, arms going around him to slowly work a crowbar under the window._

_"Keep those noises up and we won't get much more work done." Shiro whispered in his ear, making him squeak and duck out from between his arms. Keith quickly slid to the other side of the room, bright red. He sat down and decided to just watch Shiro work. Yeah, he definitely wouldn't mind not getting any more work done, especially when his boyfriend had arms like that, but the window wasn't open and he didn't exactly want to die while having sex._

_It took the whole day to finish with the shack, the two slumped outside when they finished, soaked in sweat. Keith was glad they had the week off, he didn't want to go back to his dorm. Shiro turned his head and grinned at him, moving closer and leaning against him, one arm behind Keith's back. Keith slumped into his side, grimacing at the extra sweat now on him. Shiro kissed his head softly, looking at him with the same expression he normally had, the one Keith thought he didn't deserve._

_"We have a home now." Shiro had whispered, making Keith blank and stare at him, a silent question in his gaze. "This is our home now, I've claimed it as ours." He continued in a quiet whisper, cupping Keith's cheek and pulling him into a gentle kiss. Keith's chapped lips moved slowly against Shiro's very soft ones, his hand curling around Shiro's bicep as the kiss was slowly broken. Keith immediately moved after Shiro, capturing his lips in another kiss. Shiro made a quiet amused noise before kissing him back, his hand sliding into Keith's hair._

_"Ar_ _e you gonna carry me over the doorjamb then, pretty boy?" Keith joked, the nickname a joke from when they first met. Keith hadn't been the nicest, and had mockingly called him pretty boy when Shiro refused to spar him. The match was over fairly fast, with Keith on the ground, a staff at his throat and Shiro's face very very close to his. They sparred every time they met up at night after that, Shiro bought him gloves after a while, when he noticed that his hands were blistered from all the sparring with staffs. Shiro kissed him two days later, then ran away and it was almost two weeks before he saw Shiro again, Keith had immediately tripped him and pinned him, before telling him that kissing and running was bullshit, and if he was gonna kiss Keith once and run, he had better do it again to make up for running away._

_Shiro responded by sweeping Keith up in his arms and walking to the house, ignoring Keith's very loud squeaky protests and yells to be put down. He stopped in front of, adjusting his grip slightly so he could step through holding him. Keith fell silent, staring up at Shiro, who looked very proud of himself as he walked in the house. Keith felt like his heart was going to burst when Shiro set him down, extremely carefully._

_"Welcome home Keith." Shiro kissed him, one hand on Keith's hip, the other in his hair. Keith was glad he still had one arm around Shiro's neck, and that his boyfriend had ahold of him already, because the kiss was so intense his legs gave out from under him. Shiro immediately pulled him closer, holding him up. Keith kissed him back, tugging him closer when he tried to break the kiss. Shiro carefully guided Keith to the couch, laying him down and hovering on top of him without breaking the kiss. When they finally broke the kiss, both of them were breathing heavily._

_Shiro started pressing kisses all over Keith's face. "I love you Keith." Shiro was happy to see Keith's face turn red, right before he got pushed off the couch._

_"You're heavy, and sweaty," Keith grumbled, standing up and slipping past him, Shiro watched him walk over to the duffle bag and grab a towel. "I'm showering.....and I love you too." Keith said quickly before sliding into the tiny bathroom. It had taken him a while to finally say it while looking at Shiro._

\--

Sure, they had their fights, and Keith would admit most of them were because of himself, and not listening to Shiro, or being too hard headed. Sometimes he wondered if Shiro wanted to date someone more submissive, that would give in to whatever ideas Shiro had. Maybe someone that wouldn't tie with him in sparring matches. The one time he hated himself for being too stubborn was when Shiro wanted to celebrate Keith's birthday, and Keith had told him no.

\--

_"Why not?" Shiro asked, holding on to Keith's wrist. He had stopped him from walking away after he had very rudely told him that he wasn't celebrating his birthday, and if Shiro cared for him he would drop it._

_"Because I fucking said so, now let go of me." Keith snarled, ripping his hand from Shiro's grip. He regretted it the second he did it, pain showing clearly on Shiro's face, before he covered it up._

_"Fine, have fun with your pity party, you can spar alone and sleep alone tonight." Shiro snapped before turning and walking off, not looking back._

_"Fine! I don't need you anyways!" Keith hollered. He didn't see Shiro's face, or how those words affected him._

_He sparred hard that night, he didn't put his gloves on, choosing to attack a punching bag without them. Keith stopped when he realized his knuckles were torn up, and went back to his room. He didn't see the small present on his table, he hadn't been there since he woke up that morning. Keith washed his hands up, then bandaged them._

_Upon returning to his bed, he noticed the tiny package, and picked it up to read the typical Shiro note._

_"Happy birthday babe, I have no idea if you'll see this before we meet up in your room tonight, I hope you do. It took a while to find the perfect gift for you (Tell me what you want next year) I hope you like it, I love you <3 Shiro."_

_Keith couldn't find it in him to open the gift, and flung it across the room instead. The clock read 5 AM. He was glad his birthday fell on a Friday, he didn't have training tomorrow. Why did Shiro have to do this? He knew he had accessed his files- that much was obvious by knowing his birthday- how could he not know his parents got murdered today?_

_When Keith woke up it was almost noon. He couldn't sleep anymore and rolled over to get out of bed. The first thing he noticed was the gift from Shiro was back on his table, the second was Shiro, propped up in the corner asleep. He was curled up and looked cold, which was to be expected because Keith's room was always super fucking cold. Keith slowly slid out of bed, and carried his blanket over. Shiro looked exhausted, even in his sleep. He slowly started covering him up._

_Shiro jerked awake suddenly, eyes meeting Keith's eyes. Keith's eyes widened and he moved back a little, but didn't say anything. They stared at each other until Shiro spoke up._

_"I'm sorry about yesterday, the way I acted was rude." Why did the apology sound like something you would give at a business meeting after telling your client his wig looked like a dead rat? Shiro looked down, chewing on his lips. "If you don't want to see me anymore I understand. I shouldn't have pushed so hard." There was the expression Keith hated so much._

_"You're an idiot. Go get in bed and go to sleep." Keith didn't know what else to say. He was still upset but had come to realize that Shiro probably had no idea about his parents, and the way Keith had responded was extremely rude and immature. Shiro stared at him before glancing at the door. Keith realized Shiro thought that he meant to get out. "My bed. Yours is far away." Shiro managed a tiny smile and ruffled Keith's hair before walking to the bed and curling up, falling asleep within minutes._

_Keith had opened the present while Shiro slept, eyes going wide at the ring inside. It was a black and red spinner ring. The outside was silver, the inside was black and red striped. Keith had been looking for a new one since his last got ruined by someone running it over. There was a thin silver chain run through it, so he could wear it on a necklace._

_Once Shiro woke up, Keith managed to slowly explain why he hated his birthday, and they worked out a compromise. Shiro would celebrate with Keith the day after instead of on the day, and in return Keith would tell him when and why something upset him instead of yelling at him._

\--

Keith crumpled into the couch, finally allowing himself to cry since he heard about the news. His body shook violently as he sobbed, Shiro's sweater hugged tight against his chest. He fell asleep curled around the sweater. He didn't have the nightmares he had been having about Shiro that night, instead he dreamt about seeing Shiro again, about all the plans they had made for when he got back from the mission. They were going to adopt a puppy, try and get time off and work on their house, make the bathroom bigger, make a real bedroom, add a kitchen, have a real home. After that they would try and get missions together.

It wasn't a good awakening when Keith woke up, only to find an empty house, a tear stained sweater, and the knowledge that Shiro was probably dead.

\--

A year later, when Keith saw Shiro again, he felt like his entire world had been ripped to shreds. He didn't know what he expected when Shiro woke up, but he hasn't expected nothing. No real acknowledgement of being together before the mission, Shiro didn't say anything about missing him, or anything like that. He gave Lance more attention than him, and that hurt so much.

The first chance Keith got on the castle, he had dragged Shiro away to be alone.

"Do you not love me anymore?" The words were out before the bedroom door shut. "Do I mean anything to you? If you don't want to be with me anymore please tell me and I'll leave you alone, but you have to tell me." He couldn't swallow around the lump in his throat, couldn't meet Shiro's eyes, could barely breath. His voice was hoarse and he knew it. Tears stung at his eyes as the silence drug on.

"Keith...." A ragged gasp ripped itself out of Keith's chest, he wanted to fall apart and cry right then, but he didn't want Shiro to stay with him out of pity. Hearing Shiro say his name so fondly and lovingly fucking hurt though. He heard Shiro walking towards him, and took a step back, internally screaming at himself for it. Shiro stopped right in front of him, but Keith didn't lift his head, and chose to stare at his feet.

"Please look at me." Shiro's voice was soft, it wasn't an order, but Keith wished it was. He shook his head, refusing to look up, his hands clenched into fists so tight it was starting to hurt.

"Keith, look at me." Shiro's voice was insistent this time, and Keith slowly looked up, tears spilling over his cheeks as he met Shiro's eyes. Shiro reached up and wiped the tears away before leaning down and pressing a soft quick kiss against Keith's lips.

"Of course I want to be with you. Thinking of my promise to you is one of the reasons I'm here still. I missed you so much," Keith hugged him tightly, burying his face in Shiro's shoulder, allowing himself to cry as Shiro hugged him back, squeezing hard, but being careful with his new Galra arm. "You're the only person I would ever want to be with Keith." Shiro buried his face in Keith's hair, shaking softly as he started to cry as well. He had missed Keith so fucking much and the thought of getting back to him was the _only_ thing that kept him going. Seeing Keith cry because he thought Shiro didn't want him anymore made his chest ache.

"I love you, so so much Keith." Keith sobbed louder, clutching at his shirt like he was scared Shiro was going to leave him again.

Around two hours later, Keith was laying half on Shiro's chest, leg draped over his waist protectively as he traced shapes on Shiro's chest, glancing up at him every few minutes. Shiro had found a way to send a message to the others to say they were turning in for the night.

"Hey, Keith." Shiro pushed himself up a bit to be able to look at him. Keith raised an eyebrow lazily, looking up at him. Shiro poked his cheek gently. "Happy birthday, babe." Keith's mouth opened slightly. He had forgotten it was his birthday yesterday in all the excitement, but Shiro had remembered his birthday, and their promise.

"Thank you....I think I got the best present in the world yesterday." Keith pressed his face into Shiro's neck, leaning on him so he would lay back down. They both knew he was talking about Shiro.

When Keith woke up, it was with a violent jerk and a gasp, eyes wide and panicked as he looked around, relaxing slightly when he heard Shiro telling him it was all okay, and he was safe. He turned to Shiro, a smile slowly crawling onto his face as he blinked back tears.

"It wasn't a dream." He breathed the words out, slowly sinking back into Shiro's embrace. "You're here...."

"I'm here." Shiro assured him, kissing his head. "Back to sleep baby." Keith's brain chimed in that he could stay awake and they could do something else.

Keith told his brain to shut up.

**Author's Note:**

> While writing this I kept thinking that I needed to stop and go work on the next chapters for the fics I had planned on being long fics but that didn't happen


End file.
